Photo: The blue starling which keeps banging on our window -
trying to connect with what it believes is another bird but which is
really itself.
Synchronicities abound in life
and more so when we become aware of them. There is a little bird,
gloriously, shimmeringly blue, which bangs on our lounge-room window at
various times of the day.
Peeking through another window we can see it fly from a bush and bang
into the window. There is a shade film on the window and so it has a
mirror effect and clearly the bird believes that there is another bird, a
mate perhaps, when there is only a reflection. The bird is of course in
'love' with itself, or 'attracted' to itself, and does not know it!
That
may be more common than we know. It is said that we are attracted to
people who look 'similar' to us and that the marriages between couples
who look 'alike' are more likely to be successful. I have no fixed
opinion on it but in general, have observed, that there is some truth to
this although it is not an absolute given.
So what did
the little bird, banging into the window and possibly hurting itself,
because it was fooled into thinking the image it saw was of another,
possibly mean? It has been a time of pondering relationships with others
and with Self and also a time when illusion, or perception, from
others, has created 'false images' and deceptions.
The
bird was not hurt and it has been doing this for some weeks and will no
doubt continue to do it for some time more, so perhaps it symbolises no
more than the fact that we can find 'mirroring' in the strangest of
places and it can lead us astray more than we know. Is the bird, a
symbol of spirit and spirituality, 'banging its head against something
of a brick wall,' or is it simply responding to an inner rhythm and
need, which, while it appears foolish to those human beings looking on,
serves a valuable purpose we do not and cannot know?
Perhaps all that mattered was the fact that it gave us the opportunity,
to observe, up close, a truly beautiful little bird in ways which would
not normally be possible. It is a reminder of how often we fail to 'see'
that which is around us; we fail to truly observe, skimming in essence,
through and on our world. Like Slow Food there is a place for and a
practice in Slow Life which is less easy to find in the busy rush of the
modern world.
And in Malawi, things tend to be slower
than elsewhere because the general lack of efficiency means things
happen slowly, if they happen at all. Power cuts slow things down.
Incompetence slows things down. Inefficiency and disinterest slow things
down. It is a wonder sometimes that anything much happens at all. But
it does, and perhaps like the bird, banging away at the window, it
happens as it should, in its own time, for reasons that we do not know. I
like to think so anyway.
There is a saying that 'beggars can't be choosing' and I suspect that
applies to life in metaphorical as well as literal sense. There are a
few more beggars on the streets of Malawi these days although not as
many as there might be. The maize harvest has been good and there are
signs of improvement, which, if they continue, will make Malawi better
than it has been for a long time.
While some things have improved in Malawi, there are ominous signs that
not as much has changed as one might have hoped. The power cuts have
begun again and are worse. Every day, pretty much, for from four to
eight hours which is an increase on the old way of being of probably
four hours each time. Sigh. Still, diesel, for the moment is not in
short supply and that is good because our batteries are nearly dead and
must be replaced and the inverter cannot function for much more than an
hour when we lose power and so we have to turn on the generator to keep
things operating.
Perhaps we knew that things might get
worse because we bought a barbecue a few weeks ago and it is a godsend.
We also found small gas cans for our portable camping gas hob so
between the barbecue which uses briquettes and the hob, we can at least
cook if we are low on diesel. The camping hob came up with our goods
from Perth and I honestly cannot remember why we bought it in the first
place but it is invaluable here. As we so often say:'we have everything
we need, somewhere.' Luckily in this case the 'somewhere' is where we
are.
It is the dry season at present although we have had grey skies and the
occasional rainfull which is unusual. Then again, they had light snow in
Johannesburg today which is even more unusual. Well, unusual when
assessed in light of the brevity of human history. It may not be the
least bit unusual in terms of earth history.
We are Out
of Africa in about a week and needing it as one does. Life muddles
along pleasantly enough and you only realise you need to get out when
some small thing happens and you want to scream, smash something, kick
the door in reactions far beyond anything the incident could trigger.
It's cumulative. The small frustrations, disappointments, tediums,
annoyances, inefficiencies and trials of living in the Third World.
I
wonder why it is this way. I feel okay - I am happy with my life - I
find it fascinating, interesting, stimulating and yet clearly at
subliminal levels it is still frustrating. Perhaps it is more
frustrating because one knows there are other ways; other options and
that the world does not have to be a place of injustice, incompetence,
fear, cruelty and greed. You can get along with it and get by with it,
but knowing that there are other places in the world which are not like
this, must, by necessity create greater frustration if not anger with
the way things work here.
'Cabin fever' is part and
parcel for the course living in Africa! And the 'need' to get out only
seems to manifest when you know that you are. I used to say that people
visiting India had a ticket in their pocket which meant they would never
react or relate to it in the way that those who lived there did. Africa
is the same. Visiting is not living! It's the difference between
dipping a toe into a pool as opposed to diving in and swimming a few
lengths. A taste, not a meal. A sip, not a gulp. A tinkering, not a
'taking it apart' to really find out how it works.
But
then life brings us what we need and clearly the Third World meal is
something I need more than others. I have no doubt it nourishes and
supports and serves purpose in ways I do not perhaps know. Just as the
blue bird banging its head against the window seems without purpose, if
not 'painful,' so too can my experience here, except on both counts it
does serve purpose and the task is not necessarily to know what that
purpose is, but simply to appreciate that it exists and to appreciate
the experience for itself.
